Annoyances




	Loads of things that some of us love to hate Motorists who it would seem obtained their licence from a cut-price Christmas cracker. This covers a multitude of sins but special mentions go to those who drive in the fast lanes of motorways until about 10' before their junction and those who believe it's perfectly OK to park on double yellow lines provided they are also half on the pavement and/or have their hazard lights on. Politicians. Football pundits who refer to Sir Alex Ferguson as `Alec' Sir Alex Ferguson. People who believe this country being a republic would actually make a difference to more than 0.0001% of the population. The hypocrisy of not legalising cannabis whilst being quite happy to rake in massive tax revenues on alcohol and tobacco. People who don't seem to realise non-smokers die too. Pub renovations. The WWF for successfully suing the World Wrestling Federation and making it change its name because they reckoned people might actually confuse the two organisations. People who seem to have had children for the sole purpose of having someone to push around because they haven't the bottle to do it to someone their own size. People who go to church and somehow believe this makes them superior to those who don't and/or absolves them of anything they do in the other 160 odd hours in the week. People who call Scalextric `Scalectrix' People who call Trivial Pursuit `Trivial Pursuits' Indoor TV aerials that only work while you are touching them. Anyone who believes there's such a thing as excessive masturbation. Teenagers. Motorists that sit in the middle/outside lane for no reason. Daytime television. Most current chart music. PC's doing very unexpected things. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the tv remote but refuse to walk to the tv and change the channel manually. People who say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too. Too right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? People who say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I still be standing here? People who believe their political views are THE political view. They are right, you are wrong. Council estate women who have loads of kids, despite not having any money, then expecting the state, i.e. the taxpayer, to pay for them. Council estate women who despite having no money can always afford to have a fag hanging out of the corner of their mouths. People who never look towards the main road to see if a car is turning when they are crossing a side road. Young middle-class white kids acting, dressing and talking as though they are deprived black kids from the ghetto. People who murder in the name of religion. People who use their sex or colour as an 'excuse'. Snobs. Caravans. Middle lane drivers. People who wear a uniform (policeman particularly) and think they are God. People who swear in front of children. People who support football clubs for their success, but have absolutely no connection to that club. People with more than 10 items at the '10 items or less' isle. Where 2 lanes are coned off on a motorway for about 10 miles before you actually discover someone working. People who park in assigned spaces (i.e. disabled, mum & toddler) in car parks simply because they can't be bothered to walk a few yards. Those who park in the pick-up / drop-off areas at supermarkets, etc. then go do their shopping. People who park too close to road junctions so that you can't get in/out of roads without doing a 50-point turn. People who are asked to be somewhere at or by a certain time then moan when they feel hard done by (such as at airports). Those who are asked to be treated 'just like everybody else' and then say that you're being unfair or prejudiced against them when you do treat them as you would do others. People who use the lift for only one floor. Tailgaters. Using the phone while driving (now illegal). Cyclists on footpaths. IKEA - its a 4 letter word for a good reason. Those adverts featuring perfect skin and body tone 16 year olds who allegedly hate cellulite or ageing skin - as if its a problem for them yet. Those adverts with those naff woman who preen and fret about their dull/lifeless/straight/frizzy/dry/greasy/non-sheen hair...... ooh such a problem, there’re people starving to death in this world for goodness sake. Pedestrians who walk on cycle paths. Motorists who park across cycle lanes. Cyclists who think the highway code doesn't apply to them, e.g. jumping red lights, no lights at night, cycling on pavements, riding the wrong way on one way streets, riding through pedestrian areas, riding on the wrong side of the road. Motorists with disabled stickers who seem to think that this means they can completely disregard the Highway Code. An example of this round here being them parking on the double yellows right by the bus station entrance, often making it extremely difficult / impossible for the buses to get in and usually they are just sat in the car while someone else has popped into the shopping centre of something. Call me old fashioned, but I thought car parks were designed for such purposes. Volvo drivers who think they have their own rules, ask any motorcyclist. They seem to think they are immune to damage due to those big thick bumpers. People holding up the queue at the supermarket checkout looking for ‘the right money’ (“I’ve got it here somewhere”). People holding up the queue at the supermarket checkout by not having their money ready in the first place. Stupid questions, e.g. “Is it raining?” Americanised English, e.g. skejool for schedule, & ether for either, ‘for free’ instead of just ‘free’, and hundreds more. And I certainly don’t want regular chips (not fries, note), I only want them occasionally. (The bastard software I build this site with has a spell-checker that even wanted me to replace the ‘s’ with a ‘z’ in the first word of this paragraph.) People who make up lists that other people get annoyed with. (Touché) Persistent potholes in the road. People who don’t reply to invitations.


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